Scatter my ashes here...

Scatter my ashes here...
scatter my ashes in the desert...

Thursday, November 26, 2015

Day 26: Thanksgiving Morning

I woke up to this scene. An inch and still falling, 23 degrees. It's a good day to be indoors, cooking. Isabelle can't get enough of the snow. She doesn't know when it's time to come in now. I have to go out in the middle of the yard, coax her into standing up and walking toward the house. I know she'll enjoy the smells and tastes of Thanksgiving.

Last night as I was going to bed, it was raining. I'm sure that has turned to ice. A good day to not be on the road. I love the snow and how it makes everything so quiet. Part of me wants to be out running in it. But my better judgement has kicked in. It won't be a good thing, between the ice and my lungs. It's supposed to be super cold the next few days. Whenever it gets into the single digits, Internet access is poor. It will be a challenge.

Yesterday I pulled handfuls of thyme, parsley, cilantro and oregano out of the garden before it got frozen and buried by snow. I can use it to cook and make the turkey soup afterward. The only thing I don't like about winter here is the ice. Other than that, I can deal with it, even the occasional subzero temperatures. The reason we get so much ice is that our daytime temperatures in the winter tend to be above freezing, or the sun is intense enough that it melts the snow during the day and then it freezes when the sun goes down.

The other day in the grocery store I ran into an acquaintance, a woman I've met on my runs near the lake. We stopped and talked for a while. She's about my age, and we've both been struggling between being busy and in her case, injuries, and trying to motivate ourselves to do even the bare minimum. I know I need to get back to at least doing the cross training and the resistance work. I am turning into such a pile of mush.

The challenge for me is developing a program that I will stick to, which means, it has to be something I can do in just a few minutes, that doesn't require me to stop and take a block of time out of my day. But I have to be able to remember to do it. That means making it a habit. Where did my motivation go?

I do feel motivated to cook and eat today, which is a good thing...

and it's good for my little snow Buffalo too.

Wednesday, November 25, 2015

Day 25: A Girl and Her Buffalo

We're just hanging out. I'm getting some work done, going out to lunch today with an old friend from my ICU days, all the Thanksgiving shopping is done to cook for tomorrow, and I'm working on bits of the new website. Still coughing, but it's getting better. No Turkey Trot for me this year, though.

I feel like going for a good walk and I might have to do that later because it's supposed to get super cold, like single digits, and maybe snow, over the next few days. I'll have to bundle up really well and I'm not sure how my lungs will respond to the intense cold air. I'll try though. I'm really hoping I have the worst of this behind me and can start on somewhat of a regular routine next week. I'm uncomfortable in my clothes, my body feels like a big blob.

I love my little Bella. She's looking forward to the turkey smells and tastes. She needs a break from salmon. I'm looking forward to the time to hang out with Dennis and Isabelle and not have to do much of anything. Wishing you all a happy Thanksgiving too.

Tuesday, November 24, 2015

Day 24: A Day Trip to Denver

Again, very little to report as far as running goes. I do miss it. I don't feel deathly ill, but I don't feel great. I'm able to get through a pretty full day, but I just don't seem to be able to get going yet. Maybe after this weekend. I'm coughing stuff up in the mornings. It helps, at least I feel like I can get the oxygen in.

Today I had a business meeting with someone that lasted nearly 3 hours, but was very worthwhile and enjoyable. I met a woman who is well-connected in the patient advocacy and cancer survivorship community, and we had a great talk. I went over my content with her and she gave some great ideas and feedback. I'm so excited for this. It all takes longer than you want it to, but this was a great opportunity to meet a very knowledgeable and resourceful person in my line of work. Turns out we are both originally from the same area outside of Philadelphia.

Afterwards I drove home up I-25, the full moon was rising in some pink clouds to the east and the sun was setting over the Rockies in the west, with some awesome cloud formations. I pulled over near Loveland and took some pictures.

I am looking forward to running again.

Monday, November 23, 2015

Day 23: Return of the Geese

Like groundhog day, only better, because it only has to be repeated once.

I took my car back into the dealer today to get the airbags done, hoping their computers would be working. Fortunately they were. A friend picked me up and we went out to breakfast and talked about our businesses, then she dropped me off at home, and I walked back to the dealer later to pick it up. Yay, done.

Today the geese were flying overhead in their V arrangements, and I saw them at the schoolyard and other places where they like to hang out. It made me sad, I miss Iris. She loved to check out the geese, and of course, she loved goose poop. Isabelle never was much of a fan of it unless Iris was around to set an example. Otherwise Isabelle would have ignored it.

I tried taking The Bella for a walk this afternoon and she didn't want to go. She wandered around in the yard, front and back, but wouldn't go down the street. I know this will be a one day at a time thing from here on. She's still eating, and she still likes to talk to us, beg for food, and sleep between us at night.

Thanksgiving is coming and it's also a reminder that at this time last year, that was when Iris first had a problem with her eye, we took her to the vet the evening before Thanksgiving hoping to get something to help her get through the holiday. At that point we were treating it like an infection, but the vet told us the possibilities, and I conveniently tucked that brain tumor idea in the back of my mind at the time. Nine months later it became real for us, but who knows how much Iris was hiding that whole time. We saw signs like her tripping while walking, drinking a lot of water, and being more lethargic around the house than usual, but she never missed a walk or a treat. Easy to chalk it up to age when you don't want to think worst case scenario.

I had to go through my pictures today too, I've been looking for images for my new website, and I flipped through hundreds of pictures of the girls. I can't play the videos when Isabelle is around because she hears Iris's voice and it upsets her.

I know eventually Isabelle will "go see Iris", but she hasn't given us any indication that she's ready. So we will continue to spoil her with salmon and chicken broth dinners, occasional trips to Dairy Queen, and weekend rides in the cart to Starbucks for a pup cup. Here's a video of Isabelle enjoying a pup cup at Starbucks this past weekend.

Sunday, November 22, 2015

Day 22: Schoolyard Tree

Yesterday afternoon I was going stir crazy and needed to get out of the cave. I am still feeling tired and coughing up junk from my lungs. But I walked over to a nearby schoolyard, about a mile from my house, where there is a distinctive old cottonwood tree.

I have this thing about trees out in the open, by themselves. I love to photograph them and used to paint them in pastel, but I don't have time to paint these days. My ultrahypo blog features lone trees as the post images.

I thought I'd share my photo exploration of the tree with you, for something different. I don't know if next week I'll be running again or headed to a doctor appointment. Sort of depends on how I feel when I wake up tomorrow. But for now, I can at least enjoy the close up, slow view of the things I usually run by every day. ABC: Always Bring a Camera. So here it is, close up.

Approach on land
the geese have returned
My usual view
Getting closer
The crown is so wide it doesn't fit without a wide angle lens
Roots of wisdom
The circumference of this tree is bigger than me
Up close and personal
In awe of these limbs
In all directions
Reaching for the sky
How many years did it take
Bark design
Way above my head
Old roots
So much detail
Color and shadows
Each crack tells a story

In the bright sun
Twigs and clouds
More wisdom in here
Shady side
Interior design
Looking in
Walls and carpet
North wall
South wall
Come back again

Walking away, excuse the tree selfie. It was really cold outside, I wasn't trying to look like a badass.

Saturday, November 21, 2015

Day 21: A Cold Day to Spoil The Bella

I wish I had some running news but I am still hacking up beautiful colors. Waking up this morning to 15 degrees, putting the Bella outside to do her business, I knew I would have to keep busy to distract myself from wanting to be out playing.

The Bella didn't want to come in, she likes to hang out in the cold. But after an hour I was starting to worry about her, so I coaxed her inside. She was shivering! I don't like the idea of my 14 1/2 year old dog being cold, so I heated up some chicken broth and gave it to her, and covered her with a blanket and rubbed her down, like I used to when we'd give her a bath in the bathtub when she was a puppy. She loved it.

Soon it was time for her dad to take her to Starbucks for a pup cup. He tucked her in under a blanket for the ride.

Spoiling the dog is a great alternative to running. I have no idea when I will feel better. If I am still really feeling bad by Monday I might go in and see the doctor. This sort of sucks. But Isabelle is enjoying it.